Creating a Sense of Community Throughout The Appalachian Highlands

Things I Will Never Understand…

Remember when you were a teenager and knew everything there was to know about life? It’s amazing how we turn 13 and immediately become an expert on every subject, but when we’re in our early 20’s, life slaps us square in the face and we realize that we actually know very little about anything.

Last November, I turned 29 for the 15th time and you know what I’ve learned in my time here on earth? There are many things I will NEVER understand. Here are a few of them in no particular order:

  1. Nude leggings and the people who wear them.
  2. People who don’t like chocolate and women who “forget to eat”.
  3. Why 100% of men do not need makeup, but 99.999% of women do.
  4. Golf and the people who like to play it in inclement weather.
  5. When people use pictures of relatives or animals as their profile pictures.
  6. Sushi and the people who are obsessed with eating it.
  7. Why people insist on identifying it as “goat’s milk” or “goat cheese”. We don’t call it “cow cheese”. I also don’t understand why people can’t see that the word “goat” is extremely unappetizing.
  8. Women who spend $500 on a single purse when my $40 purse serves the same purpose.
  9. Mathematics.
  10. Why there are six current television shows about “little people”.
  11. People who have no concept of personal space and those who lack the social skills to know when they should shut up.
  12. Why we have to put ourselves in debt to get an education so we can get a job to pay off the debt we incurred while getting our degree.
  13. People who suck the fun out of every activity with their negativity.
  14. People who wake up happy and ready to face the day with wonder and excitement (aka. The people I want to throat punch).
  15. Why men can’t locate anything they’ve lost, but women can locate it immediately by simply looking in the place where the item was last seen.
  16. Why the people who are devoid of personality are the only ones who don’t know they are dull.
  17. How I can spend $300 at the grocery store, but my kids swear we have nothing to eat.
  18. People who use the words “like” and/or “whatever” twelve times in every sentence.
  19. Why someone doesn’t run for POTUS on the platform of “Free Wi-Fi everywhere you go”, because you know that person would win. Free Wi-Fi everywhere would definitely make America great again.
  20. How we can put a man on the moon, but we still have spotty cell service in so many places?
  21. People who are preoccupied with Star Wars, The Walking Dead, or Dr. Who.
  22. American people with tattoos written in a foreign language.
  23. Why my “Sinus Rinse Kit” says “dishwasher safe”. Who washes these things with their dishes? No, really, who is doing this? Please let me know so I can remember to bring my own dishes when I am invited to eat at your house.
  24. The usefulness of Linked In and Snapchat.
  25. Why daily naps are mandatory for kindergarteners, but not for hardworking adults.
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Beth is a wife to Stephen, mother of 2 boys, and business owner who is passionate about Jesus. She likes the color orange, good grammar, and junk food; she detests misspelled words, laziness, and mouth noises of all kinds. She is also passionate about helping people create residual income by working part time from home.